thoughts

it is almost overwhelming all these possibilities of new expiernces begining and secure expiernces ending.

I have been waiting for this semster since I started graduate school. I can not belive it is finially here. 9 credits left. A lot of debt. Less than 4 months and I will be walking down an aisle with my fancy black gown and the really cool hat that graduate students get to wear. i think MFA is brown on the trim color but I dont remember. I guess within the next few weeks I will find out. I need to actually go to school drop off my thesis along with register for graduation. I havent done a stich of work over break. I really needed some mental time off. I have been working so hard for so long and all these amazing things are comming to pass.

I know I dont have the job yet. I am interviewing for the second time today. Which is amazing. Finding a job in the city is so hard. I hope it is enough money. I finically can not cut it with under 44, 000. Too much debt too many bills and too much responsibility. If I do get the job- I am counting down to the day I can sell my car. Which would be about 500+ a month in which I wouldnt have to spend.

We talked about moving yesterday. I dont know why - both of us know home is in NY. But I am getting antsy. Maybe On the Road effected me more than I am willingly admitting to. For the first time in my life I am not going to be tied down to school- I guess this is why I want to go somewhere so bad. Philly is close enough to not be far away. It is still in a city although smaller and cheaper. But I dont think we would be happy anywhere but here. However, there is chat about CA. It warm there but I have a fear of earthquakes I would have to get over. I guess my feelings are i need to be somewhere there is an art scene, a fun sexually liberal town along with public transporation. That means we are kinda limited. Maybe I'll figure out how to move is to Paris and live in my dream.

I promised Justin I would clean up the apartment this weekend and I didnt. So I plan on spending most of today making things neater and doing laundry. I have a giant pile of mess that I need to put into the closet. I am such a slob. I guess I am just scatter brained with so much going on in my life.