sakura

you briefly wonder about people - you take a 3rd person perspective glance into their lives and cease to wonder. the longing for a quick memory is gone before it actually even started. their growth, lack there of, or yours is too far apart to even attempt to rekindle any life into a fire that may have once existed. do tunes ever really change, or are the sounds the same after thousands of years just like the passing of seasons. people always remaining as they were, either hunters or gatherers, not always your gender assignment, but more of a personalty trait.

little things- a smell, a sight, a shared joke, makes you think about them and miss that moment, but not miss anything else. your life hasnt changed for worse with out them around. it has continued on its track of either success or failure, depending on who you are or what point in the journey you are in. weather you hunt or gather. i hunt usually leaving a trail of gathers in my path rarely looking back to think of anything i may have done or not done- it doesnt matter so why think about it. you wouldnt change the situation you have now or the situations coming. you hunted for them. and you have found some of what you want leaving those things you tried to do in the past and rarely giving a second thought. the only regrets you have are moments when you tried to be a gatherer, didnt do your hunting. secretly you did your fair share in some odd way, collecting and filling in areas that lacked with others to pick up the slack. if only you had opened your eyes. that is what you think about when you regret not miss. regret is so different then miss. miss is usually something that you found pleasure in. regret is something you found nothing where you thought you would one day find a miss.

when you look - you realize, that most people who matter at some point are just like the sakura. beautiful for the time they are in bloom and a carpet of a faded pink memory when you glance out the window after the storm. something that you'll see only tens of times in a life. meanwhile somewhere in your life, sakura in bloom grow as the fallen fade. will you look back upon these blossoms as you did upon those on the ground. heartless for walking away you question, and some probably state. it is less complicated not thinking about sakura. especially as autumn approaches and those memories are long since passed.

worlds apart they say. they being defined as me, myself and I - or the id, ego and superego. it's better to not look for too long at the trail of petals behind you that have been walked on, floated beside you or were still alive when you passed.too long in a memory ruins the beauty. where the petal is now doesn't matter, you enjoyed it for what it was when you were beside it. and like a hunter, you give thanks for the moments of beauty you witnessed and hope to find more in the future as there are other things that need your attention and this time the soft green leaves of summer to watch turn and fall into another carpet to only lead to a blanket of fallen white snow and enjoying the sakura, or experiences that now bloom in your life some of those sprouting from under the carpet of where petals lay.