as time passes

the day of my birth is less than 24 hours away. this probably requires a prolific post about where i have been in my life, what my goals are, where i am currently. doesn't this all require some amazing revelation of my purpose.

alright so the past: so yes, i have been a lot of places. i do not need to get hammered and spend the night looking at old photos, or reminiscing with people from my past.

when my mom was this age. I was 10. which means she was already working as an RN for 8 years, she was working at an eye doctors office, starting what turned into a really great career. I was in 5th grade i think. so i was in girlscouts, this may have been the year my mom tried to superglue my badges to my sash. she still can't sew. she was a really good mom.

when my dad was this age, he was recording an album, i think, maybe he was 28 when that happened..either way he was out on tour or living the high life in NYC, shopping at some of the same stores i shop at, dressing in all leather with big hair and spending days at photoshoots or sleeping and nights recording tracks or playing.

when my grandma was this age, she had been married 6 years (i think) and had 2 children, already lost one or 2 from miscarriages, probably was living in baltimore and trying to adopt a child

when my grandpa was this age, i think he got a great career job at for a big company, and wore one of those white nuclear testing suits at work. go electrical engineer, physics major! had 2 kids and dealing with the emotional stress of a wife who was losing babies.

when justin was this age, i met him. other than that he was having a career life crisis, quit his job and had a lot of fun and living in nj.

so, at this age what am i doing? starting a solid career,(it seems like 27 and 28 are all about your career choices) although the 6 years of experience before me has given me a solid foundation, i now feel like i have a future doing something i enjoy. starting my project management certification and getting my adobe photoshop certification. considering next year to start teaching a night class on the university level and thinking about writing a book this year.

On the fun side of things, prancing around in latex when i get the chance and helping out/modeling for tb on this friend of an employee plan. which isn't bad. i adore it and have a great time doing so.

i have no kids, not planning on it yet either, i am not married. (well neither were my parents i think they got married at 28 and 29) i do live in amazing place with a boyfriend who i love and adore very much 8 minutes from union square on a very quiet old school block in williamsburg, bk. i am 63K in debt due to grad school. still owe 12k on my car. trying to figure out how to pay it off. i think this years tax return is going to go toward it.

So in the last year what changes have i made- what have i accomplished.
- finished my thesis and my mfa
- searched and found a really fun job where i get to do all the things i love and get paid to do them (PM, design print, TRAVEL, attend classes, help people make better manuals, talk alot to understand people's issues, help them solve problems and teach)
- found an amazing apartment and moved
- fell in love with latex clothing
- made some really amazing friends
- traveled for fun all over the place

isn't that enough for less than 365 days? i think so.

i wonder what this year will bring.

mixed thought process

so it is my favorite day of the month and it is also my least favorite day of the month.

today is cramps and headache from hell (least favorite- it means I feel not so good, and I also do not get to have really wonderful sex before i leave for work)

but tonight, i get to go to acupuncture. i <3 acupuncture. i always feel so wonderful after it. It helps my back pain- which i am pretty sure is casued by the crappy seat I sit here at the office along with poor muscle tone in my abdominal muscles. My body never really had the core strength it did previous to surgery.

which brings me to think i need to work out more than I am. Right now I am doing about 2 hours on Friday Sat and Sunday. And 30 min of yoga or cardio 2-3 times during the week. The scale has stayed the same but my body has gotten thinner and tighter. my flabby thighs have gotten toned and less fatty. This is good. This is even prooved by that today (period start bloat day) i put on this super cute polkadot dress I got last summer and was a little tight and never fot quite right, fits perfectly now.

i hate the scale, i am 6 pounds hjeavier than I was last april, but my clothes fit me losser and i feel better. can you say: i built some new muscle.

but i think i want to go back to belly dance 1 or 2 times a week- i really miss dancing. i need to look into this.
...
so this whole weight loss thing is for me this time around. I know there are some end goals that i would like to look amazing at (wedding at gotham hall, trip in may to pr, all the time i spend in fl on the beach, my class reunion next year)but really this whole mission is for me, to feel not just good (which i feel now) but to feel amazing!!!! help my back bei n less pain, have better enurance, feel energetic, and tone up again.

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on a side note - i have a new addiction to Yahoo's Launchcast, thanks to a friend at work. it is amazing. its like having an amazing MP3 collection with out the hassle for building the thing. you just need to check it out.

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so what do i want for my birthday? you can always just go to the baroness shop on thursdays and ask "the girl" what i need- she will have a list of suggestions.
.....

so yeah, i had nothing interesting to say

sunrise

so i am getting ready to go to work today. out there, on the line. this is a good experience for me. me, who hides behind a desk and computer

i should be doing my mop of hair.

instead i am sitting at the desk, looking outside a beach front hotel room staring at the sunrise and the bands of color over the water.

what a beautiful morning.